Forward Motion

We finally have some tangible forward motion!  I delivered our dossier (the packet of information we send to Meg's country about us, including our home study, that allows us to be registered to adopt a child) to be apostilled (every page needs to be notarized, then apostilled.  An apostille is basically an international notary) in the Lieutenant Governor's office at the state capital last week and we got it back yesterday!

 The beautiful capital building

 Our dossier paperwork before I submit it for aposilles.  This dossier (including the home study) has taken up a rather large chunk of my time and energy the last 2.5 months.  I am very protective of this baby!

 Here it is a week later improved with lots of expensive gold stamps!

 Aren't the stamps purdy?

 Whelp, there goes the carnival money!  Thanks to everyone who donated!  Thanks to you our dossier can be translated and submitted in Meg's country!

So long, capital hill.  See you again in a few months!

Our precious dossier is now on its way via Fed Ex to our adoption agency who adds a few of their own papers to it.  They will then be Fed Ex'ing it to Meg's country!  After being translated, it gets submitted to the Ministry of Education.  Once they review it and give us the green light (sometimes they need more paperwork), we will be officially registered in the region and get a referral with travel dates to come meet a child/children!!  Woot woot!  This whole process can take very little time, or it can take months.  The bottom line, though, is that we've done our part and the rest is out of our hands!  Well, at least for this initial registration dossier.  We will need a whole new dossier for court, but that's a post for another day!

In other news, we sent our USCIS (United States Customs and Immigration) application to adopt a foreign child in last week as well!  As long as they don't need any additional information, we will soon be in the clear with the US to bring home a little one and make her officially ours!

So close, yet so far away.  We are getting excited, though, because information on when we first travel *should* be coming relatively soon!  We will FINALLY have some sort of time table to tell ourselves and others.  Hooray!

The Long and Winding Road

I know that sometimes the road to adoption can be very long and winding.  We are currently on our own rugged path, and while it can be very frustrating and disheartening, it is also amazing, spiritual, and encouraging. 

We found out some very heartbreaking news on September 19th.  Meg was no longer on her country's database for children without parental care.  We didn't know exactly what it meant, but we knew it wasn't good.  From the very beginning of this journey, we have known this was a possibility.  No legal hold is placed on a child until your dossier is submitted and registered in country, a referral given, the child visited, and then the referral signed (so basically after the first visit).  Even then, if the parents or any native of the child's country step forward and are willing to take the child, you no longer have a hold on the child.  Even after court and the child is declared yours, the family could come forward for another 30 days and take the child back.  It is a gamble we were willing to take.  The chances of another family taking the child you're pursuing are very, very rare.  In our child's country, only 15% of children born with Down syndrome are raised in families.  85% of them are in orphanages.  With those statistics, it's unlikely that someone is going to come adopt the very child you're working to adopt.  Rare, but it does happen.

We have been in somewhat of a holding pattern for a few weeks now trying to decide what to do.  Our agency agreed to try to investigate what happened to our little Meg, though they were skeptical they would be able to find anything out as we have not registered in the region yet (they have laws similar to HIPPA that prohibit information from being shared about the children without a prospective adoptive family being registered). 

Suspecting that Meg would be permanently unavailable for adoption, we started the search for a new child.  We searched the database for hours trying to find the child we felt should be ours.  We found several we love and even really pursued one, but after about two weeks of sending emails to the other agency, we still hadn't received a single email back.  We felt stuck.  Our agency did find out that our sweet, precious little Meg was in foster care in her country and would not be available for us to adopt unless the foster family returned her.  It is supposed to be a permanent placement foster home that leads to adoption.  Then on Thursday (October 4), this is the email we got from our agency:

(This is from the facilitator in Meg's region.  DS obviously stands for Down syndrome.)
"Today  when I spoke with the lady who works with the database she said that there are many kids with DS, but the Ministery (in Meg's region) never placed DS kids for international adoption and they don't know how judges will react on this. Anyway, I've talked then with the Chief of the Welfare Department and she agreed to have this risk and try to place a DS child internationally. But she insists that the dossier should be received first, and then she would find a good candidate for the family. She also confirmed that there are MANY kids with DS and yes very young girls. I think now that I will call tomorrow to the director of the orphanage where those kids could live and ask her about  DS girls from 0 to 2 years old available for adoption. If she has those girls, I'll let you know, but I'm not sure I'll be able to get the photos. I will try.  This would be a very good thing if we could place a DS girl and they could see how successful it could be.  Maybe they would put their DS kids on the database and not hide them."

The woman from our adoption agency in the U.S. forwarded this to me as well and sent this note from herself:
"Please think about Oksana's email.  You have the possibility of changing the attitudes in this Region.  How great would it be if more special needs children were placed!  I really hope you will consider this option.  You can still register in more than one Region, but this is such a great opportunity, I would hate to see it go by.  It would still keep you in the P*** (confidential until adoption is final) Region until we see how the foster family feel about adopting "Meg."

Well, I have to say that this is the answer I was looking for!  It's a little scary not being able to see pictures of kids beforehand and just having to go on blind faith that we will find a child we connect with and feel should be part of our family, but how do we pass up the prompting that this is what we are supposed to do?  We don't!  The Welfare Department in Meg's region has been amazing already!  They know we're coming, and they even put a little girl on the database for us to see!  So exciting!   This also means that if anytime Meg becomes available again, we will snatch her right up!

Thank you, as always, for your incredible support!  We are swimming in love from our friends, family, neighbors, and even strangers!  It's possible we are the most blessed family on earth!  Love to you all and we will keep you updated on our journey!

P.S. This is the little girl we fell in love with but won't be able to adopt because she is in the wrong region.  I emailed her picture to Reece's Rainbow and they put her on their site!  I even got to name her ( I named her McCall.  Not only do I love that name, but I adore my cousin, McCall as well)!  If someone reading this loves her as much as I do, please go save her!!!  Click here to view her profile on Reece's Rainbow.  They don't come more precious than this!  Her birthday is the same month and year as Meg's.  She turned one in August.  I want to kiss her cheeks!

 

The Best Part

Yesterday at church, several people apologized for not being able to make our carnival and handed us checks for large amounts of money.  The same thing happened to my mom at church.  It has continued into today, and we have made around $800 more because of our carnival.  I am simply amazed by the goodness of people.  I have to say that the money is amazing, but even more amazing is the support and love.  We feel so lifted up by the friends and family around us!  The kind, smiling faces, words of encouragement, and willingness to share their personal funds are making the burden that is international adoption light!  We are deeply grateful!  I won't be able to personally thank each of you, but I have such an overwhelming feeling of thankfulness for you all that I can't even put it into words!  The money piece of this adoption has been, since the beginning, the absolute stress of my life.  While we aren't yet halfway to our goal, I know it will happen.  Slowly but surely, the good people around us have donated, helped, and supported.  We've raised nearly $18,000!  How is that even possible!?  Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of our hearts!